Be My Guard
by kottanbellsan
Summary: Oneshot. Grimmhime drabbles. Grimmjow and Orihime realize what a mess their lives are, because of each other.


**Be My Guard**

**Author: kottanbellsan  
Series: Bleach, by Tite Kubo  
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or anything.  
Pairing: Grimmhime!!  
Rating: T  
Synopsis: Oneshot. Grimmhime drabbles. Grimmjow and Orihime realize what a mess their lives are, because of each other.  
A/N: Drabbles simply because I'm feeling emo. Inspired by and adapted lines from the lyrics of Yui's songs.  
**  
He knows. For god's sake, he _friggin'_ knows it all.

He knows, for instance, how when she kisses him, it is _him_ that she pictures.

He knows that one day, when _he_ comes to her rescue, she'll just go ahead and live happily ever after with _him_.

He also knows that she would never fall for a dead man, a.k.a. himself, who wants to kill her knight in shining armour.

Yeah, he totally got all of that.

But he _also_ knows that she is being bullied and trampled on by a bunch of crazy, jealous female arrancars who have ugly things on their bodies called heads, and that she is being manipulated by Aizen and tortured by Ulquiorra's lack of emotion. He also knows that she, unlike him and probably every soul in Hueco Mundo, is _kind_ and _sacrificial_ and _noble_- because that's just the way she is. Inoue Orihime. _The_ human girl. The most beautiful living creature he has ever set his cerulean eyes on.

"G- Grimmjow-sama.."

He hates the way she looks like she is going to fall apart everytime he looks at her. And maybe that's why he finds himself swooping down on her again, trapping her comparatively smaller body against the wall, wanting to shield her, wanting to cling on to her before she leaves with the shinigami and disappears into thin air. He doesn't want her to go.

But he just couldn't get past being the fearless, no-one-fucks-with-me-Sexta-Espada. He just couldn't go down on his knees and be all "Come to me, quit lying to yourself!"-- because _nothing_ was a lie. The absolute truth? Orihime was meant to be with Hikoboshi, who obviously wasn't him. Nobody could change the fates that were written in the stars since like a billion years ago, let alone a hollow-eating Espada.

And that's why--

"I hate ya, ya know," he says carelessly, breathing down on her collarbone.

xxx

Her life was a mess. She wasn't supposed to be born to hurt _anyone_.

Especially the man whom she had grown to love over the past few months. Or the man whom she had always loved. No one was supposed to get hurt.

She hated the way his eyes were filled with so much pain.

She hated how she couldn't ever let the words "I love you" slip past her chapped lips without feeling guilty.

She hated how she knew there was a fifty-percent chance this battle was going to end with her losing him.

She hated the fact that within _seconds_ her tears were going to spill over and get onto his bare chest, again.

"..G- Gomenasai."

She was shaking uncontrollably from crying, but it wasn't like she could help it. Being cornered by Grimmjow- again- only seemed to compress all of her faults and mistakes into one tiny hole and envelop her, making it difficult to breathe. It seemed like all she ever did in Hueco Mundo was to cry, because, what other ways were there to solve her problems? The white walls _were_ walls, albeit cold and unfriendly ones. They never answered her questions.

But Grimmjow's presence was comforting.

Stressful, yes, but comforting.

Like how the Sun may let people feel hot and bothered, but without it, there wasn't light.

Without Grimmjow, she couldn't possibly have survived being in Las Noches, where everything was darkness.

Without Grimmjow, she wouldn't have gotten her first kiss.

Without Grimmjow, she wouldn't have realized how her heart could actually be shared amongst two people who were in fact arch enemies. (To date, this still shocks her a little.)

xxx

He hates it when she apologizes. Really does.

This whole thing was honestly better off with her just hating him. Anyway, since when had he started to care about all of this? Love? Pain? Ha! He didn't use to feel any of that.

Didn't. Use. To.

Roughly, he slammed his lips against her slightly parted ones, making her gasp slightly at having her little crying session interrupted. Does she even see it, what he truly was? Has she? An animal. A not-so-clever, power-hungry and selfish jerk who recently just got a little too obsessed with thinking with his heart instead of his head. He hadn't wanted to be _the_ good guy. He hadn't wanted to act tough and as though 'yeah, that shinigami can have you' and he didn't care.

He hadn't wanted to fall for her this bad.

Because ever since he did, his anger and violence thing never lasted very long.

xxx

Orihime shut her eyes as she felt the kiss become softer, more gentle.

Grimmjow.. did she understand him at all? But it wasn't as though she even understood a bit of herself.

_Who am I supposed to give up?_

She felt the Sexta Espada's hands run up and down her body, passionately. And, not knowing what to do, she only hugged him tighter, burying her face in his neck.

_Why can't we just stay like this?_

"I really fuckin' hate your guts."

_In a corner of the town, we hold hands. Hidden in the night, with no place to go back to._

Maybe it was really better if they had nothing to do with each other.

Maybe.

Because she didn't know anymore.

"Me too."


End file.
